Thursday, July 19, 2012

Life After Divorce: Healing Emotionally

Here's my new article for LAFamily.com this week.

I think the advice I've shared applies to all of us as we go through challenging times. I hope you will share it with those you love and care about. 

Here's the link, as well. I would love you to scroll to the bottom and "like" it.  Please share your comments and thoughts, too :) 

  http://www.lafamily.com/marriage-and-divorce/life-after-divorce-healing-emotionally

 Life After Divorce: Healing Emotionally

Life After Divorce: Healing Emotionally
Rebuilding your life post divorce is difficult. You are moving into unknown territory, beginning to live a new life without your spouse by your side. Some of us have children while others do not. Either way, it is a lonely time. Making it a priority to heal emotionally is key to your overall well-being and happiness.  As you heal emotionally, be sure to surround yourself with those you love and care about.
Here are some helpful ways to heal emotionally after divorce:
Leisure time is a must:
How you spent your leisure time before divorce will be different post divorce. Make it a priority each week to set up new ways to enjoy your leisure time. Read each night before going to sleep. Choose a book that will inspire you and lift your spirits. Meet your friends each week for a "girls night out" or luch. Taking time to connect face to face with them each week will give you something to look forward to, reminding you that you are not alone. If you have children, plan an evening each week to go together to a movie, have a picnic, go to the park to play, attend a cultural event in your community, etc. Planning positive, new leisure time activities for yourself and your family will lift your spirits emotionally, helping you heal.
Quieting your mind:
Taking time each day to quiet your mind post divorce will help you heal emotionally. There are many different methods and ways to focus on "just being." Daily meditation, yoga classes or doing yoga at home, Tai Chi, or going for a quiet walk are a few ways to quiet your mind and connect with your emotions in a positive way. By quieting your mind, you are able to gain control of the negative feelings, thoughts and fears you may have.  Being able to replace these difficult emotions with inner tranquility and peace will help you make great progress in healing emotionally.
Keep a journal, write it down:
 An important reason to keep a journal, especially post divorce, is that it gives you a way to express your feelings, getting your heart felt emotions out on paper. Venting your feelings and emotions in your journal is very helpful post divorce. If you have children, provide them with a journal of their own, and invite them to write their feelings down each day. Using this wonderful tool of writing out your emotions will help your heart to heal. You and your children will feel a greater peace and calmness, because you have gotten your feelings out on paper.
Laughter is good for the heart and soul:
We all know that laughter is literally good for the heart and soul. This couldn't be more true post divorce. Finding things to laugh about will do wonders for your emotional well-being. Laughter literally releases our pent up stress. Endorphins are released when we laugh, helping us relax and feel more peaceful inside. Watching a funny movie or video, being surrounded by people who love to laugh, attending a comedy club, and finding things in your own life to laugh out loud about will help your heart to heal and bring peace to your soul.
Exercise relaxes the body and mind:
Exercise will help quiet your mind post divorce. Going outside for a brisk walk, a run or bike ride, etc. each day releases endorphins, which help relax your mind. If you have children, take time to exercise with them, as well. Your choice of exercise will not only clear your mind, but make you feel better physically. If you suffer from physical ailments brought on by stress post divorce (headaches, upset stomach, backaches, depression), taking time to exercise each day will relieve these ailments. You will feel much better overall physically, mentally and emotionally, and so will your children.
Taking time for healthy leisure activities, quieting your mind, writing in your journal, laughing and exercising are all important as you move forward with your new life.  Rebuilding your life post divorce while implementing these healthy tips will help you, and your children heal emotionally.  One last reminder, be sure to surround yourself with those you love and care about through it all.
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Lisa LaBelle More Articles By This Author

Lisa has a B.S. degree in Education, working towards her MS degree in Counseling. She's taught for over 25 years. Lisa is a family and child advocate. She's the co-author and co-editor of Hope After Divorce, published by Sourced Media Books. Follow Lisa's blog at http://hopeafterdivorce.blogspot.com, facebook page http://www.facebook.com/hopeafterdivorce and twitter @hopeafterdivorc. She oversees and contributes to www.hopeafterdivorce.net. Lisa is the mother of two grown sons who are her inspiration.

6 comments:

  1. Even if the people involved have seen it on the horizon, divorce is always difficult. Regardless, divorce can create peace for individuals and even entire families when conflict within a marriage cannot be resolved. Once the decision is final, the ideal situation is to end things as smoothly and as quickly as possible.




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  2. I absolutely agree, thank you for sharing!

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